Tracy Morgan for Hillary Clinton

OK, it wasn't actually Tracy Morgan, but I was watching a bit of SNL's Best of Tracy Morgan sometime in the last week or two, and his impression of Maya Angelou was absolutely dead-on. So when I got Maya's robo-call last night on my answering machine, shilling for Hillary Clinton, it cracked me up again.

Listen here

Light One Up For Fred

I'm with Fred in the '08 South Carolina GOP Primary. In the current climate (dominated by the new castrati), any candidate with the balls to buy a cigar in front of cameras is worthy of my vote.

Now, next week when the Democrat Party pollsters and campaigners start ringing my phone 15-20 times a night, I'm actually going to pick it up and have some fun with them whenever possible. I am, of course, going to do what the good Democrat's did in New Hampshire: I'm going to tell them that I'm voting for Barry (you know... the black guy). But, unlike the New Hampshire Democrats, I'm not going to go in the voting booth (because I will have already voted...) and vote for the white woman who only got to where she is because her husband cheated on her. (Update: Just in case you were still wondering, Chris Matthews has no balls.)

Photo courtesy the Greenville News

Comments on Luminox Post

Anonymous left this comment on my previous post:

"Real men don't carry umbrellas.....or wear watches."

Well, a REAL man carries an umbrella so that the woman his is with....and he is with one a lot...does not get rained on.

As for wearing a watch, I give you this:




Chuck Norris has to wear a watch, because Chuck Norris likes to know how long you stayed airborne after he roundhouse kicked you in the face.

Stuff A Guy Really Needs: Luminox Model 822

I have an obsession with time. I don't know why, and I don't try to analyze it, except to think that it has something to do with being a chronic procrastinator. I have watches and clocks all over the place, and every once in a while I get fixated on one in particular.

The current object of my watch lust is the Luminox Model 822.

There's really nothing special about the watch itself, and I have a Citizen Eco-Drive that has the same functions and looks almost the same. So, as my wife always says, why do I want another watch? Because I can't stand not being able to see my watch in the dark. I remember when I was a kid, I had a watch where the hands would glow all night long, and I could set it on my nightstand and see it clearly. It didn't have that annoying backlighting that digital clocks have, and I didn't have to press a button to make it light up. I just looked over and it was there. Simple and effective. It glowed all night because it had radioactive material painted onto the hands and numbers that gave off it's own greenish light.

Well, somewhere along the line they stopped using the radioactive stuff and went to a bioluminescent paint which glows for a certain period after being exposed to light. How long it glows, apparently, is determined by how thick the paint is applied. Cheaper watches have less paint. Anyway, most of the watches I have glow for a couple of hours or so, and since I usually wake up around 3 a.m or so, this is no good. There is a new paint callled SuperLuminova that is supposed to glow brighter and longer, but I want one that, basically, will be glowing when I pull it out of a drawer after it's sat there in the dark for three days. I mean, what if I got caught in a mine cave-in? True, it's unlikely, but it could happen. I'd be screwed.

Then I found the Luminox, which is one of the more inexpensive watches that still use self-powered (radioactive) luminescence. On each hand and at each hour marking, there is a micro-tube containing tritium gas. The gas gives off it's own light and is guarranteed to glow continuously for twenty five years. Other manufacturer's use this technology, but the watches are much more expensive. Luminox offers models down to $179.

The Luminox Model 822 has just taken the Number 1 spot on my "got to have it" list.